Gileah….and The Ghost Train

Katy “I Kissed A Girl” Perry (formerly Katy Hudson, not the actress of similar name) is huge this year. And I’m not saying that I’m a complete prude, but I avoid her recent single. I don’t watch (what they play of) the video on MTV, and I haven’t been interested in hearing her discuss what makeup she wears to the E! people. I haven’t been quite sure why I don’t like the song, because I’m not extremely judgmental- especially when it comes to music. Maybe it’s because I have a two-year-old daughter and another one on the way. I’ve been reacting so strongly because I realize that I need to decide what these little girls will be exposed to in the future.

Somehow, I was not aware that Ms. Perry released a Christian record when she was sixteen, in 2001. I listened to a song from that record on YouTube and, although it wasn’t the deepest Christian song ever, she was only a girl (who hadn’t yet kissed a girl) and it showed promise.

Now, I am also a preacher’s kid. I grew up in pretty strict environment. And, as I mentioned in my previous post, I wasn’t allowed to listen to mainstream music until I was nearly grown. And I did “lots of bad things” as a teenager, as well. But I wasn’t a true Christ-follower when I was young. And I felt like I was floating through life, too. If I hadn’t married Chris then I never would have known what God was all about. Being the daughter of a pastor or a Christian doesn’t give you automatic entrance into the Kingdom. It was only after I had my daughter that I was saved by Grace and Love. I looked at her tiny face and felt such Love…it was the beginning for her and it was a new beginning for me. Finally, God pulled me past all those guilt and doubt and sin and shame roadblocks. They’d served their purpose. One must realize the true depravity of human nature to be able to accept God’s mercy. I’d been hanging out in the Slough of Despond for far too long. My parents might have given me a gentle nudge down The Path when I was a girl, but I was quite easily felled only moments into the journey.

And -this might be it’s own future post- even after I confessed God with my mouth, it took a couple of years before I was ready to confess Him in my art.

So, though I don’t like her song, I can’t say anything bad of Katy Perry. She could be me, or I could be her- but for the Grace of God…. And there was Truth in those songs she sang when she was a girl. There’s probably a good bit of truth in her new record, too. I would find it hard to believe that she just completely forgot where she came from. From now on, whenever that song comes on I’m going to thank God for His Mercy on me, and pray for her. (Does that sound like I’ve gone all Christianese on your arse? Understand that I say that from my heart, and not in an I-Am-Better-Than-Her-Attitude.) Who knows what good and pure and lovely things she might sing about in the future, since she has in the past? I wish I had her audience! Granted, I’m a good five years older than she is….and I wouldn’t look half so good in short shorts and colored Keds.

I grew up solely on Christian contemporary music. My dad is a preacher, has been since I was about two years old, and in the 80’s it was still rather new and cool to have somewhat modern sounding music with Christian themes. He also put the Psalms to music. Word for word. He didn’t try to make the verses rhyme. Those Psalms have always made me think of the original singers and dancers and musicians of the Old Testament.
As a teenager I was cruel to dad about his life work. I remember telling him that I didn’t think I believed. The look on his face that moment is branded on my brain. But even in my lowest spiritual valley I was still fiercely proud of Dad’s Psalms and Hymns and Spiritual Songs. In my deepest heart I knew that those songs would eventually bring me back home.

One of the first “secular” artists I listened to was Sunny Day Real Estate. Listening to them was like finding a colorful, new country in my backyard. The songs that I was writing at the time took quite a turn. My (very sweet) friends started telling me that could hear Enigk in my voice. I had an affected voice, because I hadn’t found mine yet. But I don’t mind those years of sounding like his shadowy little sister.
So when Chris told me about this new song today…
….hep hep huzzah, Jeremy! He sounds better than the last couple of times I’ve seen him. He looks a little more like Phil Collins, which I find positively delightful. I will always love that voice.

Back to my father and his music. These are a few songs we recorded with him in the last couple of years. I would not be who I am without him. Musically or spiritually. And now he is an equally rabid Enigk and Company fan. All is well.

Mom, I promise I will write a blog about you one day….

I listened to earth’s ‘ear piercing…chirps and whistles‘ that could conceivably be heard by aliens. Or maybe one big Alien named God? This article described the sounds as awful, but I think they’re soothing. (Or did they mean that the sound recording quality was awful?) Of course, the volume isn’t completely up on my computer. And also, I’ve grown accustomed to the awful sound of a two-year-old’s temper tantrums.

What I really love is the guy’s voice on the Space website. I haven’t spent any time browsing science sites, but now I realize there’s a whole new world just waiting to be discovered…in CYBER space, at least.

Madeleine L’Engle would have had something very profound and spiritual to say about this. I love her books, but half the time I don’t know what the heck she’s talking about. Tessering sounds like fun, though, even if I don’t understand the science of it.
(Please hold…I’m searching the word…)
And- I’m back.
Wikipedia says that L’Engle’s tessering description more closely resembles a wormhole. And now it makes more sense to me.

I heard (or read on the internet) the other day that having quick and easy ”answers” readily available on the internet is turning our brains into mush. Sometimes my brain does feel quite mushy. And I do miss the days when I’d come to a concept or word that I was unfamiliar with and Dad said, “Go look it up.” I was usually too lazy to actually look it up in the encyclopedia or dictionary, so I would keep it on file in my as-yet-unmushy brain and when I’d come across the word a few more times in other reading I had a pretty good idea of what it meant. This, however, is not a suggested strategy for pronouncing new words. I’ve lightly embarrassed myself a number of times by mispronouncing words I should have known, had I only looked them up.

One more thing on the quick-and-easiness of the internet: SO MUCH of what I read on the internet is either 1) wholly or partly untrue and/or 2) only an opinion. (This blog falls into that second category….) The internet was written by people like you and me, unless you happen to be an SAT author, or a contributor to the Encyclopedia Britannica or something. I’m just talking it out on paper for my own sake. I don’t quite understand why I am (currently) compelled to publish it for the whole world to see.

On that note- I’m confused. My brain is mushy. Signing off….Here’s hoping the aliens aren’t headed straight here to blow us up after hearing these chirps and whistles….

G.

If weblogs are anything like diaries then I’ll write too much in the beginning pages. Then I’ll gaze out the window for awhile (that’s my head in the clouds) and pick up the pen for a few pages of scratchy lines and circles. Someone will call the house phone and I’ll jot a message for my husband in the corner of the next page, but forget to tear it out. I’ll write one good line. Finally. And put down the pen to pick up my guitar.

Diary?

I forgot I had one.

Hmmmm….flipping through the pages.

This is all old stuff. I need a new journal. A pretty one. Hardcover. Paisley in earth colors. Unlined pages. And a new pen.

There. Now I’m ready to write….